I’m starting to cringe at things. You probably wouldn’t notice if you were around me. And I’m finding there is a lot of stuff setting me off. It’s becoming impossible to live in my house..even though I”ve hired a housekeeper. What’s the point in spending the money when the house is a disaster again within 12 hours? Mention the word diet to me and I’ll tell you how I feel about them. If you insist on keeping talking about dieting and eating habits, I start to shut down and I’ll do my best to smile and nod at you. So far I haven’t started yelling at someone to SHUT THE FUCK UP I DON”T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR STUPID DIETING PHILOSOPHIES WHEN I”M IN THE MIDDLE OF DEALING WITH AN EATING DISORDER! I don’t have the capacity to deal with it.
I’m on the verge of a fight with my mother. I’m not looking forward to tomorrow. I have to make my way to work after having only been in the office since Thursday. I have today, Wednesday and Friday off too..so I really should try to make an appearance tomorrow.
Booked an appointment with the doctor for Wednesday. I need Dr.’s notes anyhow for massage and orthotics. But I really need a break. I can’t tell my parents though. They have a problem with me taking a sick day for a legitimate cold. Very old fashioned mentalitiy. I can’t take it.